Romantic trips with Rahman

"Thevai ethuvum thevai illai

Thevai enthan thevathaiyae! "

The above lines, a part of the deeply moving 'Ennodu nee irunthaal' song from the movie 'I', which when translated mean - I do not need any need of mine. All I need is my angel - finally succeeded in bringing a tear as I listened to it for the 3rd time.

I once came across this line in a film - "Unfulfilled romance is the best romance". It seemed a great piece of writing then but very soon after, I realized that writing was very different from living. There are many things that writing could glamorize which living could possibly never. A long and a beautiful poem written about a lonely guy on a bench could never even come close to the warmth of sitting near a close one on the same bench. A mouth-watering descriptive piece about an Indian dish could never become a substitute for sharing the same dish with a close one. 

And so there are two things that I have started to believe in, with the passage of time - first being that 'tragedies make for good writing but never for a peaceful life' and the second being a slight alteration of the above mentioned dialogue - "Unfulfilled romance is never the best romance, unless probably there is a Rahman 'sad melody' (since I couldn't come up with a better term) to accompany you". 

So, does a Rahman 'sad melody' make up for a lost love? Definitely not.

But for something that cannot be got back, it does provide a soothing companion. Yes, it does bring about a few tears. But then, why hold back them? 

For some reason, the lyrics of a song attract our attention more when we are sad in contrast to the happy times when it is the music that keeps us glued. 

"Nilavinai ennaku arugil kaatiyathu nee thaane.. arugil kaatiyathu nee thaane..

Malarin mugavarigal sonnathum nee thaane..."

(I would be committing a conscious crime if I tried to translate these priceless lines)

"Veesungindra thendrale... velai illai nindru po...

Pesugindra vennilaa... penmai illai ointhu po..."

" Kaatril kaneerai aetri.. Kavithai senthaenai ootri.. Kannae un vaasal saerthaen..

Oyum jeevan odum munnae, ododi vaa... "

" Paal mazhai'ku kaathirukkum bhoomi illaya.. Oru pandigai'ku kaathirukkum saami illaya..

Vaarthai vara kaathirukkum kavignan illaya.. Naan kaathirunthaal kaadhal innum neelum illaya..."

The lyrics of every sad melody of Rahman's have imprinted themselves in my otherwise pathetic memory so badly that some random song in its entirety comes rushing in my head at a moment's glance of the close one. And the result, I wouldn't complain as to be a devastating one. Rather, the song and the tune in my head make me cherish the moment more than it ever calls for. And the misery at heart does get embroiled in serenity which readily becomes a more than welcome relief then. 

I read long back in a newspaper article about a little girl in comatose state who had been made to listen continuously to Rahman's melodies by her mom which doctors believed had been the main reason for her recovery when she had come out of her comatose six months later.

I would never be able to forgive myself if I compared myself with that little girl who had fought those six dark months with grit and determination and Rahman. 

But I guess that I could probably say that Rahman has been one of the main reasons that I survived a phase I very strongly believed would be my last and Rahman still continues to be one of the main reasons that I overcome a sudden flood of haunting memories with a tear and a smile, a song later.

Even as I finish typing this post, plays one of my most favorite Rahman sad melodies through my earphones.

"Izhaitha kavithai nee.. Ezhuthu pizhaiyum nee.. 

Iraval velicham nee.. Iravin kaneer nee..

Ennadhu vaanam nee.. Izhantha siragum nee..

Naan thooki vazhartha thuyaram nee....

Oru dheivam thantha poovae...." 

And the song/my life goes on...