27th September, 2014
It was thirty minutes past ten in the morning when we came out of the auditorium where the Tamil cine quiz finals had been conducted. For the questions asked, we had known most of the answers than many of the teams that had made it through to the finals. My teammate had even tried to shout out a few answers to the competing teams much to the organizer's dismay but then he realized that it would not make any difference and had remained silent.
As we walked out of the auditorium, my teammates who were really hungry, the three of us having not eaten our breakfast, said that it would be better to proceed to the food-court and have a brunch of sorts. I agreed and followed them but the food was the least part of my concern. My mind was filled with only two things - her twinkle and her water-dripping red shawl that had covered her head. And the food-court was one of the few places where I had a very high chance of coming across her again.
After telling my teammates to order a 'Veg Tawa roll' for me, I started roaming around the food-court. The earlier day had had me doing the same thing by mid-afternoon walking around gasping in awe at any beautiful girl who had passed by me. But this current tour of mine was different. It had a purpose. I did not care about any sleeveless t-shirt wearing girl that passed by. I did not feel any pang of jealousy at any coolers wearing guy sharing a pizza with some random pretty girl. The only thing I cared about was seeing that mascara layered eyes shrinking slowly leading to the ephemeral yet ethereal smile/dimple.
But as the day slowly passed and noon approached, the mission seemed to be becoming futile and my heart started getting heavier at the thought of not seeing her again. And it was at such a time that one of my teammates received a phone call from his father.
The chaos
As my teammate ended the phone call from his father, his face had started going pale. We realized that it had been some bad news and when he told us what his father had said, we ourselves were shocked.
A case had been filed against our state(Tamil Nadu)'s chief minister way back in 1997 citing that she owned disproportionate assets of around 65 crores and thanks to India's swift justice system, the case had been dragging on for 18 years. But a poor honest judge had seen it fit to finally close the case and had handed out a judgement convicting our chief minister and had sentenced her to 4 years of imprisonment along with the additional gift of a 100 crore rupee fine.
It was the first time in our country's political history that a ruling chief minister had been asked to step down from his/her post owing to a court sentence. And this historical event had decided to present itself on the very day that I had come to NIT-T in search of my under-the-tree-in-heavy-rain romance.
As my teammates and I discussed among ourselves as to how come our chief minister had been convicted, as it is pretty rare for Indian politicians to get convicted for the crimes they commit, my mobile phone began vibrating in my pant pocket. It was my mom.
"Who the hell told you to go to NIT today?" shouted my mom as soon as I replied to her question as to where was I. I couldn't possibly tell her the real reason and frankly, I was not participating in any events held that day as well and so silence seemed the only best option. After ordering me continually for about ten minutes to take the first government bus back to college, my mother ended the call.
The reason she emphasized my leaving NIT-T was that a political event of such a magnitude in our country, especially in Tamil Nadu, has its own implications and outcomes and it sure did have those implications and outcomes that day - violence and chaos spread all over the state instigated by the chief minister's loyalists the very next minute the judgement was issued, not realizing that their mindless actions were not going to influence the judgement in any way.
But contrary to my mom's emphasis, I was hesitant to leave NIT-T. Reading this, one might wonder as to why this sudden attachment and ambition towards a girl whose name I did not even know. I myself was/am not able to answer it. There was the constant ache to see her again but the motive behind it remained ambiguous.
And so, when a friend of my teammate who had just then drove to NIT-T from our college by bike said that there was a chaotic situation prevailing outside with a bus being set aflame a few kilometers away and convinced our Tamil lits (literature society) head that it was unsafe to travel then and made him decide to stay at NIT-T for the night, I was more than happy.
The bonding
It was about 3 in the afternoon as about six of us from our Tamil lits walked into a canteen at a far end of NIT-T.
All of my friends, very similar to my case, had received panicked phone calls from their parents and had been scolded terribly at having admitted to be in a college about 20 kilometers from our college. And all of them had somehow managed to convince their parents that they were safe inside the campus.
About fifteen minutes later, as we positioned ourselves with our dishes around a table that had been put outside under a tree, we started talking again about the judgement that had been issued against our chief minister. And as the talk proceeded, it slowly shifted to the opposition party, corruption, ignorance of citizens, lack of intelligence, art-house cinema, commercial cinema, celebrity affairs, romantic affairs at our college and finally ended with everyone's opinion on love. Any boy would know very well that a hour's chat with another boy would very easily lay the foundation towards a solid friendship and that two and a half hour chat that we had, sitting around that table brought us closer than the three months since we had become a part of our Tamil lits had ever did.
And we spent the next two hours together, our friendship becoming stronger with every turn we took around the college. At about 8 pm, the cultural coordinator of our college received a call from our college management saying that they would arrange a van for the entire group of students who had come from our college to NIT-T. Police patrols had been set up all around the areas covering our college and NIT-T and hence had been taken our college management's decision. And it was about ten pm as the van arrived for its third trip, having taken to our college the entire group of girls on its previous two trips.
There were about fifty of us boys who had to be transported to college but the van could carry only twenty-five students per trip. It was left to us to choose as to who would go on the third trip and who would wait for another hour before being taken to college. There were about 20 of us belonging to Tamil lits and our entire group decided to stay back.
We preferred an hour together at an outside college rather than a safe drive back to our college. And that bonding that held us together then, according to me, is something that no bloody chaos or violence could tear apart.
The empty bottle
As all of us sat down together at a pavement before the spot where the van would come again to pick us up, one of my teammates started playing a Tamil film song from his mobile phone. It was a favorite to most of us in the group and one by one, my friends around started lying down on the pavement, side by side. And by about five minutes, all of them had lied down, with the song playing from the mobile phone being the only sound to be heard.
I was the only one sitting. The darkness and the song began haunting me. My thoughts began taking me back to her. Along with the friendships I had formed that day, I had also been making sincere efforts to come across her again. But by evening, I had lost my hope and had decided to make do with the 'twinkle'.
As I sat thinking about this, one of my friends behind me hit me with an empty water bottle and asked me to fill it up. I refused. I was too tired emotionally to do anything. But he kept hitting me slowly and constantly with the empty bottle that I finally grabbed it from him and walked towards the nearby 'Chemistry' block to fill water. As I entered the block, a boy standing by the entrance, having seen the empty water bottle in my hand, hastily told me that there was a problem with the water-cooler . I asked him as to where else I could fill it up and he directed me towards the administrative block that lay about twenty meters away from the chemistry block.
I walked slowly towards the administrative block trying to replay the moment that 'she' had come running to the tree along with her group in the heavy rain and had stared at me surprised. I still found it difficult to believe that such a moment had happened to me in my real life. And as my mind started getting mixed up in her thoughts again, I entered the administrative block. Asking one of the boys who walked past me the direction to the water-cooler, I walked towards it. And as I neared it, I saw a small group standing by it, filling their bottles with water. One of them kept urging the group to finish the filling process soon as their van had arrived and they were already ten minutes late. I decided to wait for the group to fill their bottles and leave as I was in no hurry and so stopped on my way and stepped into a classroom that lay open nearby. Without switching on the light, I slowly walked past the desks one by one and finally reaching the wall, I turned and started walking towards the writing-board. As I slowly walked past the second bench from the end, I could see the group passing by, in the corridor, through the doorway. I slowly kept walking towards the writing-board and it was then that I saw the last two girls of the group pass by through the doorway and it was then that my heart skipped a beat. One of the two girls that had passed by was 'her'.
I immediately ran outside the classroom and skidded to a halt. A few feet ahead of me was going the group and she was there at the end of the group in a dark-blue churidhar and a white shawl, trying to fit her bottle inside her bag and saying something to her friend while walking in a hurried manner. And in a microsecond, all the events of the previous day burst open in my head and my brain started shouting - "Do something! Do something! Call her! Shout! Do something, you fool!" but I was clueless as to what I could possibly do. And I don't know from where did the terrible idea originate, but I raised my hand up and threw down the empty bottle with a smashing force and it landed on the ground with a very mild thud. It seemed that she did not even hear it and she kept walking. "What the hell?!" screamed my brain and I started going crazy while I picked the bottle again. I could not summon my guts to shout out to her but I also couldn't tolerate her every step that kept taking her away.
She was only a few more steps away from the entrance of the building. And finally, bringing together all the courage that I had in me, I shouted out a loud "Hey!". Her friend turned immediately whilst 'she' kept walking. Her friend shook her head upwards as to ask me why I had called out. I remained silent. My mind did not appear to work. And a moment later, finally, 'she' turned. She asked her friend as to why she had stopped and as her friend pointed at me, she turned towards my direction and the moment her eyes fell on me, her eyebrows attained the upward curve again and her lips started widening slowly.
I walked towards her, with my brain screaming all along the few steps, various different things I could do - "Extend your hand", "Say your name and then extend your hand", "Don't extend your hand, just say your name and ask hers", "Say something romantic right away", "Ask her number! Ask her number!", "Say that she is the most beautiful girl you have ever seen", "Say something she would remember". But the moment I finally stopped a few inches away from her, my mind went totally blank.
"Madhu!" called out someone from the group."Hurry! There is no time to waste."
And a cracker of joy burst inside me as the name resonated in my head. But the joy did not last even for a second as her friend answered that she was coming and asked 'her' to come along. "Say something! Say something quick!" shouted my brain and finally, came out the only two words that my brain could come up with, through my mouth - "Take care!".
Her eyes widened for a second after she heard it but they quickly narrowed again resulting in the breathtaking smile and the indescribably beautiful dimple. A moment later, she shook her head in acceptance and replied, looking at me - "You too!". I stood dumbfounded. And as her friend pulled her hand forcibly and shouted at her to come, she tilted her head in a very mild way and smiling for one more time, turned away and started running with her friend.
I kept watching as she ran towards the van that had been parked at some distance away and finally disappeared into it. And slowly as my brain started playing again as to everything that had happened, I got really angry with myself as it came to the part of 'Take care'. "How the hell could someone think of something so lame?" I thought to myself. And I threw down the empty bottle again with a smashing force making it land with the same low thud.
I crushed it in anger and kicked it as far as I could. As I saw the bottle land at a heap of sand far away, I felt a sense of relief amidst all the anger and my mind slowly started comforting me saying that the two words I had uttered weren't really that bad and by the time I reached my friends who lay on the pavement, I had become convinced that those two words uttered had actually been good. As I sat down amidst them thinking about her final tilted smile, my friend hit me from behind and asked as to where was the bottle he had given to me.
Only then did I realize that it had been his bottle all along with which I had vented all my anger and grinning widely in reply to his question, I started breaking my head to say something believable to him other than my short-lived romance.
****
I looked all around the van from my seat. Everybody had slept and the only sounds that could be heard were the sounds of the engine and the wind. My teammate nearby had rested his head on my shoulder and had slept. As the distance to our college lessened with every minute, I stared through the window into the endless darkness of the sky.
My eyes closed automatically and I thought about all the incidents that had happened in those 48 hours. They had not just been memorable incidents/experiences.
They had been a lifetime.
And as I slowly opened my eyes again to stare at the pitch-black sky, a distant star twinkled and looking at the twinkle, my heart brimmed with warmth and I just couldn't help myself from smiling.
And so, when a friend of my teammate who had just then drove to NIT-T from our college by bike said that there was a chaotic situation prevailing outside with a bus being set aflame a few kilometers away and convinced our Tamil lits (literature society) head that it was unsafe to travel then and made him decide to stay at NIT-T for the night, I was more than happy.
The bonding
It was about 3 in the afternoon as about six of us from our Tamil lits walked into a canteen at a far end of NIT-T.
All of my friends, very similar to my case, had received panicked phone calls from their parents and had been scolded terribly at having admitted to be in a college about 20 kilometers from our college. And all of them had somehow managed to convince their parents that they were safe inside the campus.
About fifteen minutes later, as we positioned ourselves with our dishes around a table that had been put outside under a tree, we started talking again about the judgement that had been issued against our chief minister. And as the talk proceeded, it slowly shifted to the opposition party, corruption, ignorance of citizens, lack of intelligence, art-house cinema, commercial cinema, celebrity affairs, romantic affairs at our college and finally ended with everyone's opinion on love. Any boy would know very well that a hour's chat with another boy would very easily lay the foundation towards a solid friendship and that two and a half hour chat that we had, sitting around that table brought us closer than the three months since we had become a part of our Tamil lits had ever did.
And we spent the next two hours together, our friendship becoming stronger with every turn we took around the college. At about 8 pm, the cultural coordinator of our college received a call from our college management saying that they would arrange a van for the entire group of students who had come from our college to NIT-T. Police patrols had been set up all around the areas covering our college and NIT-T and hence had been taken our college management's decision. And it was about ten pm as the van arrived for its third trip, having taken to our college the entire group of girls on its previous two trips.
There were about fifty of us boys who had to be transported to college but the van could carry only twenty-five students per trip. It was left to us to choose as to who would go on the third trip and who would wait for another hour before being taken to college. There were about 20 of us belonging to Tamil lits and our entire group decided to stay back.
We preferred an hour together at an outside college rather than a safe drive back to our college. And that bonding that held us together then, according to me, is something that no bloody chaos or violence could tear apart.
The empty bottle
As all of us sat down together at a pavement before the spot where the van would come again to pick us up, one of my teammates started playing a Tamil film song from his mobile phone. It was a favorite to most of us in the group and one by one, my friends around started lying down on the pavement, side by side. And by about five minutes, all of them had lied down, with the song playing from the mobile phone being the only sound to be heard.
I was the only one sitting. The darkness and the song began haunting me. My thoughts began taking me back to her. Along with the friendships I had formed that day, I had also been making sincere efforts to come across her again. But by evening, I had lost my hope and had decided to make do with the 'twinkle'.
As I sat thinking about this, one of my friends behind me hit me with an empty water bottle and asked me to fill it up. I refused. I was too tired emotionally to do anything. But he kept hitting me slowly and constantly with the empty bottle that I finally grabbed it from him and walked towards the nearby 'Chemistry' block to fill water. As I entered the block, a boy standing by the entrance, having seen the empty water bottle in my hand, hastily told me that there was a problem with the water-cooler . I asked him as to where else I could fill it up and he directed me towards the administrative block that lay about twenty meters away from the chemistry block.
I walked slowly towards the administrative block trying to replay the moment that 'she' had come running to the tree along with her group in the heavy rain and had stared at me surprised. I still found it difficult to believe that such a moment had happened to me in my real life. And as my mind started getting mixed up in her thoughts again, I entered the administrative block. Asking one of the boys who walked past me the direction to the water-cooler, I walked towards it. And as I neared it, I saw a small group standing by it, filling their bottles with water. One of them kept urging the group to finish the filling process soon as their van had arrived and they were already ten minutes late. I decided to wait for the group to fill their bottles and leave as I was in no hurry and so stopped on my way and stepped into a classroom that lay open nearby. Without switching on the light, I slowly walked past the desks one by one and finally reaching the wall, I turned and started walking towards the writing-board. As I slowly walked past the second bench from the end, I could see the group passing by, in the corridor, through the doorway. I slowly kept walking towards the writing-board and it was then that I saw the last two girls of the group pass by through the doorway and it was then that my heart skipped a beat. One of the two girls that had passed by was 'her'.
I immediately ran outside the classroom and skidded to a halt. A few feet ahead of me was going the group and she was there at the end of the group in a dark-blue churidhar and a white shawl, trying to fit her bottle inside her bag and saying something to her friend while walking in a hurried manner. And in a microsecond, all the events of the previous day burst open in my head and my brain started shouting - "Do something! Do something! Call her! Shout! Do something, you fool!" but I was clueless as to what I could possibly do. And I don't know from where did the terrible idea originate, but I raised my hand up and threw down the empty bottle with a smashing force and it landed on the ground with a very mild thud. It seemed that she did not even hear it and she kept walking. "What the hell?!" screamed my brain and I started going crazy while I picked the bottle again. I could not summon my guts to shout out to her but I also couldn't tolerate her every step that kept taking her away.
She was only a few more steps away from the entrance of the building. And finally, bringing together all the courage that I had in me, I shouted out a loud "Hey!". Her friend turned immediately whilst 'she' kept walking. Her friend shook her head upwards as to ask me why I had called out. I remained silent. My mind did not appear to work. And a moment later, finally, 'she' turned. She asked her friend as to why she had stopped and as her friend pointed at me, she turned towards my direction and the moment her eyes fell on me, her eyebrows attained the upward curve again and her lips started widening slowly.
I walked towards her, with my brain screaming all along the few steps, various different things I could do - "Extend your hand", "Say your name and then extend your hand", "Don't extend your hand, just say your name and ask hers", "Say something romantic right away", "Ask her number! Ask her number!", "Say that she is the most beautiful girl you have ever seen", "Say something she would remember". But the moment I finally stopped a few inches away from her, my mind went totally blank.
"Madhu!" called out someone from the group."Hurry! There is no time to waste."
And a cracker of joy burst inside me as the name resonated in my head. But the joy did not last even for a second as her friend answered that she was coming and asked 'her' to come along. "Say something! Say something quick!" shouted my brain and finally, came out the only two words that my brain could come up with, through my mouth - "Take care!".
Her eyes widened for a second after she heard it but they quickly narrowed again resulting in the breathtaking smile and the indescribably beautiful dimple. A moment later, she shook her head in acceptance and replied, looking at me - "You too!". I stood dumbfounded. And as her friend pulled her hand forcibly and shouted at her to come, she tilted her head in a very mild way and smiling for one more time, turned away and started running with her friend.
I kept watching as she ran towards the van that had been parked at some distance away and finally disappeared into it. And slowly as my brain started playing again as to everything that had happened, I got really angry with myself as it came to the part of 'Take care'. "How the hell could someone think of something so lame?" I thought to myself. And I threw down the empty bottle again with a smashing force making it land with the same low thud.
I crushed it in anger and kicked it as far as I could. As I saw the bottle land at a heap of sand far away, I felt a sense of relief amidst all the anger and my mind slowly started comforting me saying that the two words I had uttered weren't really that bad and by the time I reached my friends who lay on the pavement, I had become convinced that those two words uttered had actually been good. As I sat down amidst them thinking about her final tilted smile, my friend hit me from behind and asked as to where was the bottle he had given to me.
Only then did I realize that it had been his bottle all along with which I had vented all my anger and grinning widely in reply to his question, I started breaking my head to say something believable to him other than my short-lived romance.
****
I looked all around the van from my seat. Everybody had slept and the only sounds that could be heard were the sounds of the engine and the wind. My teammate nearby had rested his head on my shoulder and had slept. As the distance to our college lessened with every minute, I stared through the window into the endless darkness of the sky.
My eyes closed automatically and I thought about all the incidents that had happened in those 48 hours. They had not just been memorable incidents/experiences.
They had been a lifetime.
And as I slowly opened my eyes again to stare at the pitch-black sky, a distant star twinkled and looking at the twinkle, my heart brimmed with warmth and I just couldn't help myself from smiling.
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